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New Beginnings

November 26, 2019

new beginnings meeshyd blog

I’m thrilled to write you all and share that I am starting a whole new chapter in my life. So much change is all around me and I have a feeling that this is just the beginning.

I’m officially relaunching this blog. I have a vision for this space and it’s really simple: I just want to write about the things I love in my life. Personal style, food, books, interesting content I find online, my goals, my dreams.

This is my space and I’m claiming it.

It’s weird, because I’ve wanted to be a blogger for about ten years now, but this is the first time I am truly allowing myself to pursue it. And, I feel a fire. It’s like my heart is unleashed and I’m literally buzzing with energy and ideas. I think this is the beginning of something amazing for me. I’ve always shirked from really going after blogging because I was embarrassed of my interests not being intellectual enough. I also felt like no one would care about what I had to say, but then I realized that what other people thought of me didn’t matter. Pursuing my creativity for myself is enough. Plus, I do think that people care what I have to say. I have a voice and I intend to use it.

Also…

I resigned from my job yesterday.

For two years, I worked in a culture that simply didn’t work for me. I was unhappy and it affected a lot of my life. I don’t regret the time because it was a catalyst for so much personal growth, but it’s time for me to move on. I accepted a new job in the wine industry at a place I know will be a better fit for me. I am looking forward to a clean slate and opportunity to make my work life more positive and fulfilling.

New beginnings.

They are beautiful, ripe with promise and opportunity. I am so thankful for this new chapter of my life and can’t wait to see it unfold.

What about you? Any changes on the horizon for you as we look to this new decade?

deep thoughts, workplace

How I’m Surviving a Tough Week: Self-care for Real Life

January 23, 2019

self care in the age of instagram

Whew, guys. This week is a doooooooozy. The New Year started off a little easy-breezy for me, but this week it ramped ALL THE WAY UP (to quote the great Fat Joe). Work is cray, but my personal life feels like it’s running off the rails even worse. What was supposed to be a quick, nearly-free two-day trip to Reno turned into a super expensive three-day trip that involved a hotel booked at the last minute, a snowstorm and a crazy six-hour white-knuckle drive home that required that purchase of snow chains that we never used. To top it all off,  I forgot my purse at a Jack-in-the-Box somewhere in Sacramento and didn’t realize it was forgotten until the next morning as I was scrambling to get to my dermatologist on time to have a nickel-sized hole (!!!) cut in the back of my ear to remove a basal cell carcinoma. By the time I realized what was up, I had some sketchy charges at a liquor video store, had nearly funded someone’s massive trip to Walmart and was out my ID, car keys and several debit and credit cards.

Woot. Woot.

I’m doing my best to take it all in stride and I really, honestly and truly am handling all of this much better today than I would have even a year ago. I intend to write a massive post on what I think of self-care in the age of Instagram and face masks, but I wanted to quickly jot down a couple of the habits/ways I’m dealing that I am finding massively helpful getting through this week. My hope is that some of this will be helpful for you, too.

  • Triaging my life. You know what triage is? Basically, it’s the way that places like the ER determine how they are going to address all of the people who need their help. I’m doing this relentlessly in my life right now. I’m only doing the things that are important right this minute. Sounds obvious, I know, but it’s majorly helpful for me. Things that I normally would do, like going to the grocery store, getting my nails filled, responding to all my emails, doing laundry are just not happening right now and I’m cool with it. I’m also triaging the urgent things, too. I only focus on what I must do next. Anything else, I put it on a list and decide what to tackle once I get through the current thing. The overwhelming feelings are debilitating for me, so I remind myself that I can only do one thing at a time and keep my focus on the one thing as much as possible.
  • Send out lifelines. I’m sending out the signal left and right this week. I told my boss I’m overwhelmed and set some expectations and asked him to scale back some of his asks. I asked Keith for help with certain things. I postponed anything non-essential on my meeting lists. I’m going to call my mom who is visiting this weekend and let her know that I won’t be able to be super host. You’d be surprised how much the people who love you or who work with you are willing to help if you just ask for help. I really wonder why it took me 33 years to figure this very basic life skill out.
  • Relentlessly prioritizing me. Normally, my self-care routine would fly out the window in this time of stress. I would under and over eat, cancel exercise and skimp on sleep. Right now, I’m forcing myself to get adequate sleep. For me, that is the bedrock for balanced emotion. If I don’t sleep, I lose a lot of my ability to regulate my own emotions. I also didn’t cancel my training session today. I showed up for myself and I feel so much better for having done so. Even writing this post is my way of prioritizing myself. Lastly, eating with regularly is major. Trying not to let myself get too hungry is key because it stops me from binging on all of the food and making choices that don’t honor my health.
  • Meditation. I know, here I go. I sound like such a hippie, but starting my morning off with just ten minutes of quiet and a few minutes jotting in my gratitude journal has made a huge difference. It feels less like life is coming at me. I’m not perfect at quieting my mind, but just having the intention of sitting quietly before I jump in the melee makes me feel more controlled. It also helps at night when I can’t stop my thoughts from racing. I had trouble sleeping the other night and I did this guided meditation and it put me right to sleep.
  • Keeping some Perspective. Not to minimize my own experience, but I know that in a month or even a week, all of this stuff will be just a blip. I’ll get my cards and my keys replaced. I’ll find a way to get the work done. I won’t lose my job if I don’t do it all perfectly. My family will survive if we eat more take-out than usual this week. It feels enormous in this very moment, but it’s really nothing in the grand scheme of life.

What do you guys think? Any tips to add? PLEASE share because I’m constantly searching for ways to do this stuff better. I don’t pretend to have it all figured out by any means, so I want to know alllll of your advice.

Uncategorized, workplace

My 10 work commandments

December 5, 2016

mad-men-the-crash-jump2

As a person solidly on my way to corporate middle management, I feel like I have learned a few career lessons the hard way that I’d love to share with you all. Through lots of trial and error, I’ve developed a bit of an ethos for how I approach my work. I’m still learning every day, but I’d love to share the lessons I’ve already internalized in the hope that they’ll help you take a bit of a leap on your own career journey.

Here are the 10 career commandments that I live by:

  1. Be Kind – this is so incredibly important to me. I don’t want to sacrifice my humanity for the sake of money and, if you think about it, people who view the workplace as a big competition where they have to undercut others in pursuit of titles and dollars have decided that the humanity element isn’t very important to them. That life isn’t for me. I’d rather sacrifice promotions and money to hold onto my belief that people deserve to be treated with kindness and humanity. I approach all of my work with a kindness-first perspective and I hope the people I work with notice. If not, at least I know that my ideals are still in tact.
  2. Don’t be Scared of Tough Conversations – if you grew up in a household where conflict is a dirty word, this one isn’t easy, but it’s so worth it. I’ve learned to be unafraid to have tough conversations with people I work with, whether it’s a request to rework a proposal, or to directly address someone who has given tough feedback about me to my manager. You have to be willing to address things head on or they are just going to fester. A bonus for this one is if you generally treat people with kindness, these tough conversations are a bit easier.
  3. Do your Shit – have the reputation as someone who does the things they say they’ll do. It’s so obvious, but just doing this one thing will make you better than most of the people you’ll work with by default. I think people have good intentions, but they often overpromise and underdeliver. Try to do the opposite.
  4. Admit when you mess up…right away – We’ve all had that moment where we realize we missed a big deadline or forgot to call someone we promised to. It happens. Acknowledge it right away to the person counting on you. Do not try to cover it up, do not hope they won’t notice. Just be frank and let them know you made a mistake. We’re all human and it happens and it will be okay as long as you take responsibility.
  5. Take Feedback with a Grain of Salt – man, people love to give feedback, especially in the corporate workplace. You have informal feedback, formal feedback, annual performance assessments. They’re all designed to tell you what you’re doing wrong and what you need to work on to do better. My problem with this sometimes is that it is so focused on the negative. You can spend all your time correcting the things that are hard for you, or you can lean into the things that light you up and do those really well. I choose the latter, so when feedback comes in for me about a personality trait that is just part of me and hard for me to change, I try to disregard it. Otherwise, I’ll fixate on changing something that’s almost impossible and will feel bad about myself. The caveat here is that sometimes we’re blind to things that we can easily improve or that are really irritating to others. If you get feedback about something like that, do your best to correct it and then move forward. Don’t let the feedback debilitate you.
  6. Say What you Want – a few months ago, I got really upset that someone got promoted ahead of me. Yes, it’s petty, but it happens. I realized, though, that I had not actually let my manager, director and HR rep know that I was keenly interested in a promotion and working toward that. The moment I asked, it happened soon after. It’s the old saying, closed mouths don’t get fed. Say what you want, whether it’s a person reporting to you, a new assignment, a promotion. Be willing to put in the work, but people can’t read your mind. You have to be a bit of a squeaky wheel sometimes and make sure that people are on the same page as your hopes and dreams.
  7. Do What Interests you as much as Possible – this is so obvious, but do everything in your power to be the best at the things you’re most interested in. I’ll give you an example for the field I’m in – brand management. It involves both consumer marketing and general business management. I don’t really love the business management side, so I don’t take on projects related to that side of the business if I can avoid it. My goal is to be totally competent, but not awesome at it. Why? Because I want to spend as much of my time on the side of the business that I love. I do the extra work and really pay attention to the details of the consumer side of the  business so that I am known for my skills in consumer marketing. It leads to cooler projects and new assignments related to my interests and helps me avoid an assignment where I feel dead inside because I do not enjoy the subject matter.
  8. Speak up when you’re Overwhelmed – it can be scary to raise your hand and say you have too much on your plate. There’s always that fear lurking that they’ll realize that you aren’t cut out for the job or that you’re not dependable, but it just doesn’t happen like that. If you don’t speak up when you’re overwhelmed, you’ll end up with high blood pressure (been there) or scary, stress-filled dreams (been there, too) or you’ll make a major mistake because you can’t keep up with everything (yep, been there, too). For every business, we make puts and calls all the time about what’s most important to get done. Sometimes you have to sit down with your manager and recalibrate what’s possible  and important for you to achieve.
  9. Keep Records – it’s tough to pause amidst the busy to keep records, but I never regret it.  I try to write myself a note about projects I finish, or great feedback I receive or a committee I join in real time. It helps when it comes time to write my PA and I’m sitting in front of the computer like a dummy with absolutely no recollection of what happened over the past twelve months.
  10. Find your System – there are so, so many ways to work, all kinds of organizing systems and tips and tricks out there. Whether you’re digitally integrated with Outlook or prefer an analog system for to dos, find and commit to your system. If you haven’t found your system yet, sign up for every class you can and read every self-help book on personal organization until you find something that works for you. Then, do it. All the time. It will give you such a calm mind. It might seem like more work to write things down, but it’s worth it. Eventually, it will feel like second nature and you won’t be able to imagine your life without it.

Image via google.